Heartless
by FimbulvetrIce
Summary: After losing his reason for living, Tezuka Kunimitsu sells his heart in order to rid himself of all his feelings and emotions. But centuries later, he is still searching, waiting for…something. AU, Perfect Pair


**Disclaimer: **I don't own Prince of Tennis, but I do own a few tennis racquets and a bunch of tennis balls. None of them are of the Prince brand, however.

**Summary:** After losing his reason for living, Tezuka Kunimitsu sells his heart in order to rid himself of all his feelings and emotions. But centuries later, he is still searching, waiting for…something. AU, Perfect Pair

Rated **T**, just to be safe (although I don't think it really needs to be). Angst-ish with a happy ending. Yayz?

**Warnings:** A little dark (but not really), implied shonen-ai

**A special thanks to Sileny for betaing…again! I love you! =D**

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Heartless

_By FimbulvetrIce_

Tezuka Kunimitsu thought he could live without a heart.

He wasn't what people would call _heartless_, however, as the word implies cruelty and an impassive face to the pain of others. Tezuka did not enjoy watching people suffer. He was simply described by others as cold, unemotional, and hardworking to the extreme. Those were the majority of people, the ones who couldn't be bothered to take a good look into anyone but themselves and those close to them.

Tezuka Kunimitsu had no one close to him. He didn't need them and didn't want them. They were useless to him and they would be better off not knowing him anyway. He had an air around him that attracted people, but he refused each and every one of them. Pushed away, his potential saviors looked no further.

Tezuka Kunimitsu was not heartless, but he had no heart in the literal sense. It was sold long ago by its owner in a bargain with the depths of darkness. Perhaps without a heart, he thought, he would not be able to feel himself drowning in the despair and suffering created by centuries of being alone.

And he was right. No emotion ever crossed that face again; he could not feel, could not sympathize, could not mourn. He couldn't regret his decision. Where there was once a healthy heart that beat stronger than any other, there was now an empty cavity.

Because his heart would only beat for one person, and for that person alone.

That person, the only one Tezuka would ever love, and the one that had held his life in their hands. But he got careless and let his guard down, and his precious angel slipped right through his fingers. He lost the center of his universe, the very _reason for his existence_ because he didn't hold on tight enough.

Tezuka didn't age, so every twenty years or so he would have to move to a different place to live. He had seen more places than probably all the travelers he'd met combined. But his mind's eye was blind to all of it, because of the memories that had not faded and would never leave. They surfaced, unbidden, in every waking moment of Tezuka's days…Soft, honey brown hair, a smile of an angel, the cerulean blue eyes that filled with tears in Fuji Syusuke's last moments before death claimed his soul.

Cursed with immortality, Tezuka could not die either. There was no afterlife for him; he would simply cease to be. But nonexistence was infinitely preferable to existing with the knowledge that he would never see Fuji again. If Tezuka had been able to destroy himself, he'd have found a way to do so hundreds of years ago.

Tezuka was a shell of his former self. A body without a soul driven by…by what? By all means, he would be perfectly well off (in as much in that sense as possible) just laying down somewhere waiting for the world to end.

He didn't know it, but what was left of his being was searching, waiting for something. Something, he couldn't find what.

There were things in certain people that attracted Tezuka to them. That wasn't to say he was _interested_, since without a heart he couldn't even experience that, but he observed them. Searched for that something.

The first was a boy in a village he came to in his first century of lacking a heart. The boy, named Kawamura, was kindhearted, mild and hardworking. His benevolence towards the immortal didn't affect him in the least, but the boy's dedicated spirit struck a chord with Tezuka. He saw how the boy never failed to help his father in his shop, lugging water and supplies back and forth, while working endlessly on improving his own skills so he could take over the shop in the future.

Although they conversed, he never really had a proper talk with Kawamura. This consisted of mostly Kawamura asking Tezuka how he was doing, what nice weather it was, and Tezuka occasionally grunting or nodding in reply.

Tezuka respected Taka's dedication and spirit, but he didn't find whatever he thought may have pulled him toward the boy. So he picked himself up and moved on.

The next hardworker he met was Kaidoh. The boy had a peculiar habit of hissing like a snake whenever he was irritated, embarrassed, or stressed, but Tezuka could see how he trained himself daily to become a fighter. Whether it was running, sparring or riding, Kaidoh would do it in excess and such _tenacity _in order to master it.

He never had a real conversation with Kaidoh either. Tezuka would remain silent, and Kaidoh would hiss (you can't really call that communication).

He also observed an apothecary in the same village by the name of Inui. This man was what Tezuka might label as a genius, had he been into labels. Day and night, he labored over his ghastly concoctions that worked wonders; albeit tasted terrible. He would admit that this Inui person was possibly more observant than himself, and often considered taking data and percentages down as well; since he had nothing better to do. He decided against it.

There was nothing in that village for Tezuka, so he moved again.

He met the friendly Momoshiro and his close friend, Echizen, in a small town a while later. While Momoshiro was cunning and intelligent when he meant business, Tezuka thought that he was quite thickheaded when it came to Echizen.

Echizen was the one that Tezuka really observed here, because the boy reminded Tezuka so greatly of himself. Of course, they were decidedly _different_ in many parts of their personality but were very much the same at the core. Immensely talented with huge potential , Tezuka could see himself in his own childhood taking the same steps that Echizen did. Making the choices Tezuka didn't make.

Tezuka learned very much from the Echizen boy. He saw the kind of life that he himself might have lived, had he done what Echizen had. Still, he couldn't regret the path that he chose all those years ago.

But he watched, as Echizen grew from a boy to a teenager to a man, following him through his life. When his lack of aging became too apparent Tezuka disappeared from his sight, but was always near. Watching. Observing. And Momoshiro stood by and supported Echizen through it all.

He didn't stay to watch them die. Withdrawing from that place, Tezuka walked on.

Decades later came the hyperactive, cheerful redhead named Kikumaru and his companion, Oishi.

While Tezuka did not disdain Kikumaru's bouncy, free-spirited nature, he was not amused by it. That doesn't say much, since he wasn't able to be amused in the first place…but he wouldn't have been anyway, had he the ability. Oishi, however, humored Kikumaru's bouts of affection and hyper-ness and even enjoyed them, Tezuka thought.

On the other hand, Tezuka quite preferred the company of Oishi. The man never asked unnecessary questions (because he knew that Tezuka most likely would not answer), and was polite and gentle. Although he cared and worried endlessly, which grew overprotective at times, his mannerisms did not touch Tezuka. His relationship with Kikumaru was what caught his attention.

It was similar, in a sense, to the one that Tezuka once treasured with Fuji. Although he couldn't decipher why, he could feel a dull ache somewhere in his chest area whenever he saw the two in each other's arms. When he could not stand it any longer, he left.

For centuries, Tezuka was alone. He traveled aimlessly throughout the world, accomplishing nothing for himself but making a mark everywhere he went. He didn't want to bring back unnecessary memories, so he never went to the same place twice.

Now Tezuka walked the streets of twenty-first century Tokyo, strolling the park at night. He had no purpose there, but he never planned anywhere he went nowadays. Wherever there was a pull, he went. After getting what he could from there, he would leave.

Tonight was the same as any other night. He'd been repeatedly coming back here, not knowing why. Still waiting, after all these years.

He was standing under a lamp post when the fragrance of crisp apples and roses flooded his senses. Tezuka spun around to face a painfully familiar face; the honey brown hair, flawless features, slim figure…and the brilliant, cerulean eyes that looked up at him through perfect, dusky eyelashes.

"Hello, Tezuka Kunimitsu," came a soft voice, like bells. The eyes glistened in a blissful smile. "My name is Fuji Syusuke."

As a wide-eyed and quite bewildered Tezuka pulled the brunette into his arms and wrapped him in a tight embrace, he felt something hot and wet sliding down his face.

"I'm back, Tezuka. I'm here now. I'm sorry I took so long."

And deep in his chest, he felt something beating repeatedly, like a drum.

_Ba-bump. Ba-bump. Ba-bump._

Tezuka Kunimitsu thought he could live without a heart, but his heart found its way back to him.

**END**

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By the way…Fuji's not actually an angel, Tezuka just thinks of him that way. Sorry if this story is really confusing. I'd be happy to explain if you ask. =)

**This was originally not going to have a happy ending, but I broke them up in ****Angel Child**** too, so I felt kinda bad… XD**

**I may write a prequel from Fuji's POV, depending on whether people want it or not and if I get more inspiration for it. Which, you know...both come from reviews. So review, please? =D Thank you so much!**


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